monster sarcasm rally

First they didn't invite us to our department's Christmas lunch, now this...

I went downstairs to buy lunch. I ran into Jonathan, Gareth and Good Looking. They acknowledged my existence and then squeezed together, so it was clear that I wasn't part of their group.

I went to get my lunch, and started walking back. Who should I run into? Yup — Jonathan, Gareth and Good Looking. I said hello and we started talking. They started talking about me, which was fine since I was part of the conversation. Then they repositioned themselves so that they were walking three abreast and I was behind them. It was pretty clear that I wasn't part of the group, but this time we were headed to the same place. If I had wanted to pass them, I would have had to cut them off. Not a good idea for my working relationships. And they were still talking about me!

The thing is, I expect this from Gareth. And Good Looking? Sure. He's a bit of a toady. But Jonathan? If I had feelings, they'd be hurt right now.

Okay, so I got Gareth back a bit later. He said he had a chiselled physique and that I should appreciate it. 'Chiselled out of what', I quipped. 'Cheese?'

You wait, Jonathan, I'll have my revenge!