monster sarcasm rally

Things have been good. I woke up on time this morning. I walked to work. It was warm enough out that I had to take my mittens off. I drank my tea as I walked. I got to work feeling that life was good and people really weren't that bad.

What a travesty! A good mood. What am I supposed to do with a good mood? I can't be funny when I'm in a good mood. But how can I let you, my imaginary blog readers, down?

If you come here for the funny, but instead you find some underweight chick babbling on about how the sky is blue and her job's not really that bad and her co-workers are behaving sensibly... Well... I can't see that impressing a great many people.

One by one, my fictitious friends, you would stop coming by. Without anybody to keep me company in my imaginary world, I'd be tempted to stray back into the real world. Imagine that! No, don't. It's best if we just don't go there. Ever. My hands are starting to shake a little bit just thinking about it.

You're in luck, though. Just when I thought the accursed good mood was never going to go away, the Ferengi opened her mouth.

We've been getting along lately. The truth is she's actually a nice person. Don't get me wrong, she's still just as infuriating to work with as ever. But as she gets used to me, I cease to be new and different. I'm still different from everybody else, but if I'm the same me then she can get used to me. The way she sees it, new is bad, whereas the same is ideal. I'm not new anymore. Also, I'm too used to her freakishness, so I just work around it. I've stopped noticing the fact that I do things in the most absurd way possible just to keep her happy.

She yelled at me this morning. Just for old time's sake, I think. I don't know. It didn't really make any sense. I just rolled my eyes and went out for coffee, leaving her here muttering discontentedly at my wake.

Now, it's very, very silent around here. She has decided not to speak to me.

Well, it's as quiet as it can be with people shouting and high heels clicking and news reports blaring and antique dot matrix printers screeching and other people shouting and phones ringing and what not...