monster sarcasm rally

I'm bored, so I think I'll tell you an old, old story. This one's even older than the monkey one. It goes back to my teenage days in good old Edmonton.

I spent some time working the overnight drive-thru at McD's. Now, before you go berating me for my choice in job, keep in mind that this was a long time ago and I was a different person then. And besides... Overnights were just sooooooo entertaining.

At five o'clock we had the customer changeover. The first of the early risers started to make their appearance, while the last of the post-bar crowd were still trickling in.

On this particular night a group of three guys in their late teens came through. The driver seemed sober, but the other two were clearly out of their respective trees. They were all in good moods. Silly, but good-natured... I served them and they pulled into the parking lot to eat.

A few minutes later a Cranky Old Git squealed past the menu board and came to a screeching halt at the pick-up window. I opened the window and was just opening my mouth to speak, when he started shouting.

COG: [pissed off and shouting] Call the police!
Me: [confused and stammering] I'm sorry, sir. What happened?
COG: [still shouting] I said, call the police...
Me: Why? What happened?
COG: ...to pick up the trash!
Me: [really confused] What?
COG: [repeats himself while pointing at the drunk guys eating in the parking lot] I said, call the police to pick up the trash!
Me: I'm sorry, sir, but if you want me to call the police I need to know why. What did they do?
COG: They gave me the finger.
Me: [waiting for rest of story]
COG: Well! What are you waiting for? Go call the police!
Me: I'm sorry, sir. I can't call the police because they gave you the finger.
COG: Are you refusing to do what I tell you???
Me: I'm sorry, sir. I can't call the police because they gave you the finger.
[tires screech as he peels out of the parking lot]

The Cranky Old Git, who had come in every single day until then, didn't come back for six months.

I went and talked to the driver of the other car. He said they'd been eating their food when the Cranky Old Git had pulled into the parking lot. They'd been goofing around, but nothing over the top. When COG drove past them he rolled down his window and shouted a string of obscenities at them. That's why one of them gave him the finger.

When I got home I repeated the story to my mother, She Who Lives in a Bubble. Her response makes the story ten times better.

What finger? Was it a real finger? Where did they get it? Was it in a box?